There are many major myths about anal sex. According to many in our repressed society butt stuff is taboo, which makes it easy for the less educated to spread rumors about what is easily the most fun”taboo” sexual activity known to humankind — you’re a whore if you do it, anal sex pain is something that will always be there, and other garbage lies and myths about the simple act of ass play. Why do they do it? Presumably because their own sex life is so vanilla that they want to prevent others from having fun by trying anal sex. Sadly, there are many in society who like to spread rumors about the joys of butt play.
But fortunately, there is plenty of information about anal sex out there (including at Doctor Buttstuff) that will help show much of what the “theys” of the world say about ass play to be pure unadulterated bullhonkey.
Today, we’ll be covering 8 of the most prevalent anal sex myths and providing real, reliable anal sex info you can actually trust.
Is anal sex painful all the time?
The answer to this one is a simple “no.” Yes, anal sex pain is definitely something one can encounter at first. But fortunately, there is plenty you can do to lessen anal sex pain and eventually eliminate it before you even try anal sex. For starters, you can buy sex toys that will help get you “ready” for anal intercourse. For starters, you can grab an anal trainer kit to help get you used to the feeling if something being in there. Buttplugs, dildos, even your fingers can be immensely useful in helping you with getting over anal sex pain.
Ask your partner to start slow when you have anal sex for the first time — and this should be after you’ve spent a week getting yourself ready for ass play. Also remember to use lots of lube for everything. There’s no such thing as too much. Even if it does hurt the first time, don’t assume you are always going to have problems with anal sex.
You say that it’s not always painful, but doesn’t anal sex cause permanent damage?
The short answer is “no.” The longer answer is “hell no.” There has not been a single reputable study with a broad and large sample size that has even suggested that you’re going to do permanent damage to yourself by taking it in the rear entry — and unless you’re going to trust a specious article called “Rectal Prolapse Due to Anal Sodomy!!!!!!” with six exclamation marks in the title, you can probably assume you’re safe to have anal sex. But just like with vaginal sex, it’s important to make sure that you’re all lubed up or you do risk some tearing. But that’s just common sense. As I mentioned previously, you should use lots of lube.
But if you have anal intercourse it’ll get all stretched out, right?
Once again, no. This is the same shit say about the vagina getting all stretched out after childbirth. Women’s Health asked New York City sex therapist Ian Kerner, who notes that not only is this not the case, kegel exercises can actually tone up your butthole a bit:
Kerner says he hasn’t heard of a rectum (the last part of your large intestine before your anus) getting permanently stretched out from anal sex, but he says it could happen to the anal sphincter muscle (i.e. the muscle right at the end of your anus). “That muscle is designed to tighten to retain feces until released, so the sphincter could potentially weaken,” he says.
If you’re a fan of butt play, you don’t have to give it up for fear of damaging that vital muscle, says Kerner. As it turns out, kegels, the exercise made famous for strengthening your pelvic floor and possibly boosting your orgasm, can also tone up your sphincter, he says.
You’re going to get shit all over the place though, right?
Obviously, that’s possible but not likely. As Kinkly notes, “if you have healthy, solid bowel movements, your partner will not be bumping poo. At most, there may be a little bit of residual poop, but nothing that should ruin your fun.” There’s the chance that you’ll get a little poop on things, but you can take precautions. An anal douche can work wonders, and the prospect of making a small mess can be dealt with by laying out some towels.
Are you a “whore” or a “slut” if you have anal sex?
No, of course you aren’t. It’s crazy to suggest otherwise. In fact, labeling someone who has a healthy sex life as a “slut” simply for having a healthy sex life is ridiculous and says more about you than it does the target of your hatred. The CDC reported in 2012 that nearly half of straight males and nearly 40 percent of straight women have had anal sex at least once in their lives –and it’s only been rising in popularity since then. Unless more than half the total population is a sexual degenerate, which is unlikely, it’s perfectly normal to want to have anal sex.
But if you let a man stick his penis in your ass he’ll never respect you!
No, moron, that isn’t the case at all. There are assholes out there who will walk away after having sex with someone once or even a few times, but they are going to do that anyway no matter which hole they filled. Some people are just terrible — but anal sex is actually something that can bring a couple closer because it’s more special than regular sex. It takes effort and preparation and most decent men will recognize that you did something awesome for them. It was a beautiful moment or moments you shared together that requires trust. Maybe I’m romanticizing it a bit, but I have not once lost respect for someone because she did something special for me. Never.
But now he’s just going to want to have anal sex all the time!
No, he’s not. People say the same things about blowjobs, but the beauty of the human sexual experience is that you can do a lot of things with it and have fun. Anal sex is a great experience now and again (and the additional tightness of the anus is a huge plus) but nothing can replace the other hole.
OK, Let’s say you’re right about that. You’ll get AIDS, though!
Now you’re just embarrassing yourself. It’s true that HIV and other STDs are more easily transferred via anal sex than by other sex acts, this is only really true for unprotected anal sex. Obviously, condoms are just as effective as ever and the same rules about making sure your partner and yourself are STD-free apply.
These are just some of the ridiculous myths about anal sex. There are, of course, others but these are the more common anal sex myths.
The fact is that you can enjoy buttstuff without any issues at all, or with just minor ones, and that people who say otherwise are full of shit.